DreamCatcher Feature Article: Demystifying Corporate Jargon

A recent article on the Libyan crisis caught my attention – three Dutch marines, while trying to rescue Dutch workers in Libya, were captured by Muammar Gaddafi’s forces. The official statement assures us that the marines are “doing well under the circumstances”. Exactly what these circumstances are would best be left to our imagination.

The phrase “doing well under the circumstances” is a euphemism. Wikipedia defines it as a substitution for an expression that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the receiver, using instead an agreeable or less offensive expression. It certainly sounds more palatable than what the Dutch military might privately be saying among themselves, “Those poor b********, let’s hope they’re all right.”

The military loves euphemisms. Euphemisms help to soften what they actually do, which usually is not very pleasant. An example is the term friendly fire, which means firing on your own troops. It takes a Herculean effort to find anything remotely friendly about this, especially if its recipients have just been neutralized.

Euphemisms are not only used by the military, they are found in bureaucracy and business too. In the corporate world, euphemisms are also called jargon or buzzwords. Just as in the military, they may be used to mask unpleasant news, for example, reorganization is another way of saying lay-offs. Jargon is also used to make the ordinary appear important. A long time ago, we were given to-do lists. Nowadays, managers assign action items to their subordinates. And telling your date that you are an account manager sounds a lot more impressive than admitting to being a salesman.

New hires to the workforce are often confused by the plethora of business jargon that permeate daily corporate life. Here is a survival guide of 10 commonly used business jargon, and what they actually mean. Learn to talk like your boss and soon enough, you will be aligning yourself into his strategic plans!

Jargon	What it really means
projection	guess Example: “The sales projection from marketing looks fantastic,” enthused the CEO. “We’re going ahead with the project!”
core competency	the only thing your company does well Example: “Although our core competency is making tractor parts, I’m confident we can rise to the challenge and design a tablet PC,” said the engineering manager.
I don’t disagree	I don’t agree Example: “I don’t disagree with your projection”, replied the team leader to her boss. “However, designing a tablet PC in six months is going to be challenging for my team.”
we need to double our efforts	you need to work weekends Example: “I’m confident we can meet the schedule,” said the manager to his team. “All we need is to double our efforts from now till Christmas.”
team player	apple polisher Example: “I’d like to acknowledge Eugene as a team player,” said his manager. “He has been doubling his efforts for the past six months.”
best practices	anything a team player does
push the envelope	attempt the impossible Example: “We need to push the envelope to deliver all the features on time,” said the engineering manager to his team.
gaining momentum	below expectation Example: “Our product is gaining momentum,” the sales director said excitedly. “We just doubled our sales to two units sold!”
redefine our priorities	cancel your product Example: “Although the product is gaining momentum, we need to redefine our priorities to meet business goals,” the CEO announced.
streamline operations	lay off your department Example: “We have to streamline operations after redefining our priorities,” declared the HR director. “You can collect your checks on the way out.”

By: Eu Beng LEE
DreamCatcher Technical Writing
March 2011

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